“Unresolved grief is everywhere. Incomplete recovery can prevent a person from finding new meaning in life and greatly impacts their capacity for happiness.
You don’t have to forget, get over or move on from your loss, but getting emotionally complete allows you to positively experience your fond memories, moving forward with the realization that it is actually normal and healthy to talk about your loss.
“All relationships are unique. Therefore all recovery is individual”.”
Devastated. Lost. Fragile. Questioning my own identity. Vulnerable. Sad beyond words.
That is how I felt after losing my husband, just 37 days after diagnosis to pancreatic cancer in June 2019.
I knew I was going to need help to deal with losing him. I had never felt so helpless and completely broken. I reached out, with limited knowledge and tools available to me, and with the support of a very good social worker, I spent a few months having bereavement counselling. I learned some coping techniques and strategies for managing when I felt overwhelmed, and I did a lot of talking through how I felt. But I was looking for something more to help me work through my roller-coaster of conflicting emotions, and I was still feeling like I was on a treadmill, walking through day to day life, but not really going anywhere. I just needed more.
My research led me to very limited options for grief support groups in my community. Through conversations with others who had used a support group for their own grief I learned that these groups seemed to focus on talking through the loss without a clear direction to move beyond that, and all too often I heard people felt pulled into their grief, rather than out of it.
That did not sit well with me, at all.
I stumbled across The Grief Recovery Method®, and was intrigued by what this ‘thing’ was, as I had never heard of it before. I was immediately convinced this was the way forward for me as it offered such a positive, supportive and healing focused approach, and to me, recovery sounded so healthy, empowering and complete.
And it changed my life.
Moving forward, I feel a more positive connection to my husband, and I don’t feel the painful stings or heaviness wrapping around my heart anymore. I feel like I have a much healthier relationship with my loss and my memories are not things to be afraid of or suppress, they are to be embraced as they are beautiful reminders of our life together.
Because I had struggled to find what I needed at this time in my life, I wanted other people experiencing loss to have access to this program, and I wanted to help them.
So in order to provide the very thing I was searching for, and to help others heal, I became a certified Grief Recovery Specialist®.